Starting next week, Comedy Central will bring political satire to prime time as “The Glenn Beck Show” will move from Fox News to fill Comedy Central’s 10 p.m. time slot.
To many, this move is long overdue as “The Glenn Beck Show” will fit in perfectly with Comedy Central’s “Daily Show” and “Colbert Report.” The move has come as a shock to many dimwitted Republicans who actually took “The Glenn Beck Show” seriously, though.
“I can’t believe I just spent the past five months organizing local farmers into a gorilla militia to fight Obama’s volunteers based on a show that turns out to be satire,” said Republican Randy Seers. “At least I know I can still use this group to help perfect Jews by converting them to Christianity. Thanks Ann Coulter!”
Beck admitted that he was shocked to find that so many people have mistaken his show for a serious news program, saying “I can’t believe people really thought that I would say such stupid shit if I were being serious. I mean, really, did they hear me compare Al Gore spreading awareness of global warming and Obama’s health care reform to the Holocaust? Did they hear me ask Muslim Congressman Keith Ellison to prove he’s not working with our enemies? How could anybody have thought I was serious?”
Beck was equally surprised to learn that all of Fox News Channel was supposed to be actual news.
“My agent tried to warn me and all, but after watching Fox News Channel for about five minutes, I didn’t see any way it could be serious,” said Beck. “I watched every show on that network and each show I watched further convinced me that it was satire. I can’t believe how much time I’ve wasted doing this brilliant satire without anyone realizing it was a joke.”
Beck is expected to occupy the ten 10 p.m. time slot for about seven months before taking the 11 p.m. to 12 a.m. slot from the clearly superior “Daily Show” and “Colbert Report” due to its ability to cater to old white Americans, a demographic which identifies with Beck’s biases and racism.
By Mike Lewis, Staff Writer